Proverbs 9:10
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom,
and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.
and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.
I've spent the last two weeks since my return from Pine Ridge, South Dakota decompressing. I definitely feel more solid, stable perhaps, than I was when I arrived on the Rez, but why? What does that mean? I think God gave me the answer in this verse.
While meeting people and spending time with new friends, I've been more... part frustrated, part hurt, by people's attitudes than ever. Not toward me; everyone's friendly enough. But toward their lives and toward God. Instead of earnestly seeking to do what pleases God, we justify our actions and take pride in our ability to call what is evil good. We focus on not committing sins and fail to see God's heart. Example:
I'm riding in a van with some new friends. The driver is playing California Girls by Katy Perry. He's singing along enjoying himself until Snoop Dogg comes on and utters a profane word. "Ohh!" he responds. He went too far. The entire song is based in lust. As my home pastor would say, it's a worship song to the idol Asherah. The entire song is unclean speech, but that one word is just too unclean to handle.
I've learned a lot from the prophet Jeremiah this summer. It's hard to tell if He even likes God, let alone loves Him, except for the fact that he obeys Him. That's how God tells us to express our love: "If you love me, you will obey what I command." (John 14:15)
He would complain, sure, but he would still go out and prophesy in the streets, even while knowing that people (especially religious and political leaders) want him dead for speaking the truth. They don't have the eyes to see or the ears to hear it. They had become just like the idols that they unknowingly worshiped.
Aγαπη (agape), the type of love God calls us to is not "I love you because you do good things for me or make me feel good." It's "I love you because I choose to." So I learned that it doesn't matter how I feel. Certainly some spiritual discernment is in feelings, but I had to lay myself down. I had never counted the cost, really. I have decided that whether or not I ever feel God's presence again, whether or not I have joy and peace, if indeed my life is nothing but pain, still I will choose to actively seek out God's heart to know Him and love Him.
I've learned that when I'm most down, most hurt, and most empty is often when I am the most transformed. I freely welcome the pain of healing. I invite the burn of the consuming fire removing the impurities, not just in action, but in attitude.
I've worked under the preconception that, because Christ essentially changed everything in His coming, the Old Testament can essentially be picked through like a yard sale or an old storage unit. "This is beautiful and has a low price: I'll take it; this isn't worth it, it's kinda pricey and weird. Let's throw it out." I've seen people throw out the fear of the Lord. "It can't really mean fear, of course. That's respect for God." or "The wrath of God is over now that Jesus came. God is a God of love now." Certainly no one likes a fire-and-brimstone preacher these days. Too judgemental.
How can we ever have wisdom without the fear of the Lord? I think we may accidentally have thrown that one out, too. "Woe is me!" Isaiah cries before the throne of God. "My speech and that of everyone around me is so unclean; How can I stand before you?" Only through a painful, burning coal touched to his lips is he cleansed. Then he immediately signs up for the first job God offers. He loves and obeys.
I fear God because of the pain I experienced this summer. Because of the intense spiritual darkness of being on a Native American reservation, I was stripped of most spiritual blessings I'm used to. I fought in prayer and worship and received only faint glimmers of His abounding joy. Of course I had fun at times and I loved the people I was with. But it was truly painful. I love Him more for allowing me to go through that trial and appreciate more the joy and love I get to see. And I'm more stable, secure, wise.
A passage I found in Ezekiel recently wrecked me. In a vision He gave to Ezekiel, the Lord had a man put a mark on the forehead of each person in the city of Jerusalem that was crying out to Him, anguished over the sin that permeated the city. He had six other men with deadly weapons go out to kill the rest, those without the mark. The only ones of His people that were truly worth anything to Him were those that knew His heart well enough to feel His pain. Do you? For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few. (Matthew 7:14) The path is terrifyingly narrow. It's the relationship, not the religion that will save you. There's no way that the 70 some percent of Americans who say Jesus Christ is Lord are on the narrow path to life.
I watched a video of Bill Wiese speaking on his vision of hell. People question his theology, try to poke all kinds of holes in his story, whatever. It was powerful and he pointed everything to scripture. I'd never really considered hell before. I've never had more desire to pray for my friends and family, after that. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. I live my live more in the light of eternity than I ever have because I fear Him.
Thankfully, as I learned from a friend's sermon out of the book of James, God freely gives wisdom to those who ask for it, like it's His job. I asked and received, though it was painful. Praise the Lord for the ability to know the joys and the pain of His heart.
While meeting people and spending time with new friends, I've been more... part frustrated, part hurt, by people's attitudes than ever. Not toward me; everyone's friendly enough. But toward their lives and toward God. Instead of earnestly seeking to do what pleases God, we justify our actions and take pride in our ability to call what is evil good. We focus on not committing sins and fail to see God's heart. Example:
I'm riding in a van with some new friends. The driver is playing California Girls by Katy Perry. He's singing along enjoying himself until Snoop Dogg comes on and utters a profane word. "Ohh!" he responds. He went too far. The entire song is based in lust. As my home pastor would say, it's a worship song to the idol Asherah. The entire song is unclean speech, but that one word is just too unclean to handle.
I've learned a lot from the prophet Jeremiah this summer. It's hard to tell if He even likes God, let alone loves Him, except for the fact that he obeys Him. That's how God tells us to express our love: "If you love me, you will obey what I command." (John 14:15)
He would complain, sure, but he would still go out and prophesy in the streets, even while knowing that people (especially religious and political leaders) want him dead for speaking the truth. They don't have the eyes to see or the ears to hear it. They had become just like the idols that they unknowingly worshiped.
Aγαπη (agape), the type of love God calls us to is not "I love you because you do good things for me or make me feel good." It's "I love you because I choose to." So I learned that it doesn't matter how I feel. Certainly some spiritual discernment is in feelings, but I had to lay myself down. I had never counted the cost, really. I have decided that whether or not I ever feel God's presence again, whether or not I have joy and peace, if indeed my life is nothing but pain, still I will choose to actively seek out God's heart to know Him and love Him.
I've learned that when I'm most down, most hurt, and most empty is often when I am the most transformed. I freely welcome the pain of healing. I invite the burn of the consuming fire removing the impurities, not just in action, but in attitude.
I've worked under the preconception that, because Christ essentially changed everything in His coming, the Old Testament can essentially be picked through like a yard sale or an old storage unit. "This is beautiful and has a low price: I'll take it; this isn't worth it, it's kinda pricey and weird. Let's throw it out." I've seen people throw out the fear of the Lord. "It can't really mean fear, of course. That's respect for God." or "The wrath of God is over now that Jesus came. God is a God of love now." Certainly no one likes a fire-and-brimstone preacher these days. Too judgemental.
How can we ever have wisdom without the fear of the Lord? I think we may accidentally have thrown that one out, too. "Woe is me!" Isaiah cries before the throne of God. "My speech and that of everyone around me is so unclean; How can I stand before you?" Only through a painful, burning coal touched to his lips is he cleansed. Then he immediately signs up for the first job God offers. He loves and obeys.
I fear God because of the pain I experienced this summer. Because of the intense spiritual darkness of being on a Native American reservation, I was stripped of most spiritual blessings I'm used to. I fought in prayer and worship and received only faint glimmers of His abounding joy. Of course I had fun at times and I loved the people I was with. But it was truly painful. I love Him more for allowing me to go through that trial and appreciate more the joy and love I get to see. And I'm more stable, secure, wise.
A passage I found in Ezekiel recently wrecked me. In a vision He gave to Ezekiel, the Lord had a man put a mark on the forehead of each person in the city of Jerusalem that was crying out to Him, anguished over the sin that permeated the city. He had six other men with deadly weapons go out to kill the rest, those without the mark. The only ones of His people that were truly worth anything to Him were those that knew His heart well enough to feel His pain. Do you? For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few. (Matthew 7:14) The path is terrifyingly narrow. It's the relationship, not the religion that will save you. There's no way that the 70 some percent of Americans who say Jesus Christ is Lord are on the narrow path to life.
I watched a video of Bill Wiese speaking on his vision of hell. People question his theology, try to poke all kinds of holes in his story, whatever. It was powerful and he pointed everything to scripture. I'd never really considered hell before. I've never had more desire to pray for my friends and family, after that. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. I live my live more in the light of eternity than I ever have because I fear Him.
Thankfully, as I learned from a friend's sermon out of the book of James, God freely gives wisdom to those who ask for it, like it's His job. I asked and received, though it was painful. Praise the Lord for the ability to know the joys and the pain of His heart.
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